Did Your Partner Hack Your Phone? How To Protect Yourself From Electronic/Technological Abuse

In today's world, technology is a double-edged sword. It can connect us to loved ones, provide entertainment, and even help us work or learn. But in the wrong hands, it can become a weapon of control and fear. This is especially true in abusive relationships, where an abuser may use technology to monitor, manipulate, and intimidate their victim. This type of abuse, known as electronic or technological abuse, is both dangerous and invasive, leaving victims feeling trapped and powerless.

Is Your Partner Stalking You?

What Is Electronic/Technological Abuse?

Electronic or technological abuse involves using technology to harass, control, or intimidate someone. This can include constant texting, monitoring your phone, tracking your location, hacking into your social media accounts, and even installing spyware or stalking apps on your devices. Abusers use these methods to keep tabs on every move you make, leaving you feeling like there's no escape from their control.

Is Your Phone Getting Hot or Dying Quicker than Normal?

Signs Your Phone May Be Compromised

One of the first steps in protecting yourself from technological abuse is knowing the signs that your phone or other devices might be compromised:

Battery Drains Quickly: If your phone’s battery is draining much faster than usual, it could be a sign that spyware is running in the background.

Unusual Data Usage: A sudden spike in data usage might indicate that an app is sending information from your phone to another device. Data can be checked with your carrier or in your phone's settings under Internet or Data Usage.

Strange Behavior: Your phone may start to act oddly—like turning on by itself, running slowly, or showing apps you didn’t install.

Unfamiliar Apps: Check for apps you don’t recognize, especially ones with vague or weird names. These could be stalking apps installed without your knowledge.

Pop-Ups or Ads: Increased pop-ups or ads might mean malware or spyware is present on your phone.

Location Issues: If your sim card is cloned your device might show that your location is inaccurate.

Unfamiliar Activity: Phone calls and Text messages that you didn't send show up on your phone bill. Purchases being made from your phone that you hadn't made.

Apps and Spyware Can Be Hiding In the Background

How Can Someone Hack Your Phone?

Abusers often use various tactics to gain control over their victims, and one of the ways they do this is by manipulating the victim's phone to stalk and monitor their activities. Here are some of the common methods an abuser might use:

Spyware: Abusers can install spyware on a victim's phone without their knowledge. These apps can track location, read text messages, monitor phone calls, access contacts, and even listen in on conversations. Some common spyware apps include mSpy, FlexiSPY, and Hoverwatch. These apps often run in the background, hidden from the user, making them difficult to detect.

Phone Cloning: Cloning involves copying the victim's phone data onto another device, giving the abuser full access to the victim's calls, messages, and other information. This can be done by duplicating the phone's SIM card or using specialized software. With a cloned phone, the abuser can intercept messages and calls, track the phone’s location, and access personal data, all without the victim’s knowledge.

GPS Tracking Apps: Some apps are designed specifically to track a phone’s location in real-time. These apps, such as Find My Phone or Life360, can be used by abusers to monitor where the victim is at all times. While these apps may be installed under the illusion of safety or convenience, they can easily be misused for stalking purposes.

Keyloggers: This type of software records every keystroke made on the victim's phone, including passwords, messages, and search queries. This information is then sent to the abuser, allowing them to monitor all of the victim's communications and online activities.

Remote Access Tools: RATs allow an abuser to take control of a victim's phone remotely. With a RAT installed, the abuser can view the victim’s screen, access files, and even control the phone’s camera and microphone.

SIM Swapping: This technique involves the abuser tricking the victim's mobile carrier into switching the victim's phone number to a SIM card controlled by the abuser. Once they have control over the victim’s number, the abuser can receive all calls and messages intended for the victim, gaining access to two-factor authentication codes, messages, and calls.

Monitoring Social Media Activity: Abusers can use apps that track social media activity, such as likes, comments, and posts. They might also set up fake accounts to monitor or interact with the victim’s social media profiles.

Call Forwarding: Abusers might enable call forwarding on the victim's phone so that all incoming calls are routed to another phone number controlled by the abuser. This allows them to listen to or intercept phone calls.

Text Message Mirroring: Some apps allow an abuser to mirror or forward all text messages received by the victim to their own device.

Bluetooth & Wi-Fi Tracking: An abuser might use Bluetooth or Wi-Fi connections to gain unauthorized access to the victim’s phone. This can allow them to monitor communications or track the phone’s location within a certain range.

Getting Rid of Spyware Might Not Be Enough

What to Do If Your Phone Is Hacked, Cloned, or Has a Stalking App

If you suspect your phone has been compromised, it’s crucial to take action immediately:

Stop Using the Compromised Device:

Stop using your device to do anything that could escalate your abuser's actions, only use the compromised device for basic tasks to avoid letting your abuser think that you're onto them. Use a phone or electronic device that the abuser doesn’t know about. Do not let your abuser know about this change, and only use it to communicate with trusted individuals.

Remove Suspicious Apps:

Go through your apps and uninstall any that you didn’t download. Be thorough, and look up any app you don’t recognize to make sure it’s safe.

Factory Reset Your Phone:

If you believe spyware is installed, a factory reset may be necessary. This will wipe everything from your phone, including the malicious software. However, be aware that this will also delete all your personal data, so back up anything important that isn’t connected to the abuse.

Consult a Professional:

If you’re unsure about removing the app or doing a reset, consult with a professional who can help secure your device.

Get a New Device:

Sometimes, the best option is to get a completely new device, especially if you suspect the abuser has deep access to your accounts and information. Use this device as your primary phone, but keep it hidden and only share the number with your most trusted support.

Protect Your Location for Safety

Turning Off Location Tracking and Deleting Social Media

One of the main ways abusers track their victims is through location services on your phone and social media. Here’s how to protect yourself:

Turn Off Location Services:

Go into your phone’s settings and turn off location services for all apps. This will prevent anyone from tracking your movements through your phone.

Be especially careful with apps like Google Maps or Facebook that track your location by default.

Delete or Deactivate Social Media:

Consider deleting or deactivating your social media accounts until you’re in a safe place. Social media can give away your location and other personal details that your abuser could use against you.

If you need to keep your social media, make sure your accounts are private, and remove any contacts who might report your activities to the abuser.

Protecting Your Privacy: Why It’s Important to Keep Information Close

When you’re in an abusive situation, information is power. That’s why it’s essential to keep your personal information, including your location, private. Only share your new phone number, address, or other sensitive information with the people you trust the most—those who you know will not share it with your abuser, either accidentally or intentionally.

Abusers often use information to manipulate or control their victims, so the fewer people who know your details, the safer you’ll be. If possible, establish a small, close-knit support network that you can rely on and communicate with them through secure means.

Technological abuse is a frightening and invasive form of control, but it’s important to remember that you can take steps to protect yourself. By recognizing the signs, securing your devices, and keeping your information private, you can regain control over your life and start to break free from the abuser’s grasp.

If you ever feel overwhelmed or unsure about what to do, reach out to a trusted friend, family member, or professional who can support you. Remember, you don’t have to face this alone—there are people who care and want to help you find safety and peace.

Stay safe, and take every precaution you can. Your safety and well-being are worth it.